Actress Uche Ogbodo has insisted that domestic violence can
never be the woman’s fault, disagreeing with her colleague Monalisa Chinda who
in an interview last week, was of the opinion that women can sometimes provoke
men to beat them.
In an interview with NET TV, Ogbodo said: "I disagree
with Monalisa. We all have our minds and how we understand certain things. You
know they say women talk a lot but not all women talk.
I don’t think she should capitalize on women being the cause
of domestic violence because it is not true. First of all, society looks down
on women who stay in abusive relationships and pities them for being “helpless”
and “weak.” .
Domestic violence victims can’t be categorized into a
stereotype, but range among all types of women. Yet society places a specific
insecure, weak, vulnerable woman into the category of most likely to be in an
abusive relationship.
Rather than ridicule or punish the man who commits the
abuse, this wrong perception will fault the woman for putting up with it
because she possesses these negative traits.
Women are taught that it is our personality
"traits" that got us into this problem, and therefore we feel we must
solve it. As a result, women are quick to blame themselves for why our
significant other is acting so violently.
It shouldn’t matter what you do or how you live your life,
it is the man’s choice to react in a violent or physical way. As little girls
growing up, we learn fast to always be aware and to always be afraid.
Girls are told to dress and act a certain way so as not to
upset men, yet boys are not lectured on how to react when angry or treat women
respectfully. A man’s anger is equal to his power, try and diminish it and you
risk emasculating him.
It is this gender stereotype that makes it easy for women to
receive the blame for abusive relationships instead of the man."
Monalisa is fine tuning her reply.
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Watch this space.
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